The Other Girl Friend.

Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and they were madly in love. They lived their fairly tale, and were content with what they shared. The boy also had a friend who was a girl.

Why does this story sound so strange? It's even difficult for me to find words to make it sound as it should. Being the other girl Friend. In the most recent years ( and even when I was younger) it was difficult for me to keep any of my friends that were gents, because as soon as they had a lady, they turned into ghosts. I'm still trying to decide if this is a choice or if it is instinct. In either case, I think actions are taken preemptive to try to avoid alienating the girlfriend.

In my experience, since a good chunk of my friends don't share my genitalia, its constantly a dance trying to figure out how I fit or if I fit into their lives once their love is spent on the woman of their dreams. Personally, I think it's healthy for men and women who are together to have friendships with someone other than their partner because it can bring perspective that one would not otherwise gain without an outside opinion.

HOWEVER...

Being that I'm a female (and a Libra), I can understand the concerns one may face when her boyfriend has a girl friend. Whether or not I would ever fess up to it, I will admit here and now that it doesn't matter the platonic nature of the relationship ( or how "unattractive" he may claim her to be) I will always compare myself to her. I'm sure guys do the same with other guys from time to time ( or at least once in their lives.) It's human nature to compare and contrast. Its our hope as we sit alongside that the other girl friend won't become the girlfriend.

So the grand question is... can it work?
I think people are usually quick to say yes to this question because they want to believe that they are different in how they manage their time in relationship to their relationships, but they really aren't. Consciously or subconsciously, adjustments are made according to a lot of unspoken stimuli and examination of what is happening to them with their Girl and their girl. If they don't feel a balance can be maintained( or their need are being met solely by their girlfriend) having a girl friend become obsolete. The chick in the tee drinking beer and watching football on your couch eating a steak, is now not the girl friend, but the girlfriend and you alone.

Although, I know the tension it causes to have a relationship with someone of the opposite sex when one has a partner, it seems like that balances out more when BOTH PARTIES have a significant other.

This is one delicate balance I still haven't quite figured out.. so if anyone has an insight, lay some knowledge on me.